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Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o’clock every night ... whether you’re here or not.”✧ ✧ ✧Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary!The husband yells, “When you die, I’m getting you a headstone that reads: “Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever”“Yeah?” she replies. “When you die, I’m getting you a headstone that reads: “Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At Last”✧ ✧ ✧Husband (a doctor) and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast table. Husband gets up in a rage and says, “And you are no good in bed either,” and storms out of the house.After some time, he realizes he was nasty and decides to make amends and rings her up. She comes to the phone after many rings, and the irritated husband says, “What took you so long to answer the phone?”She says, “I was in bed.”“In bed this early, doing what?”“Getting a second opinion!”✧ ✧ ✧A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement.He is so proud of himself, that he starts calling. It was at least ten inches long and immensely thick, shiny and red and swinging down like his big luscious tongue. He started to thrust his hips in place, at nothing. He wanted to fuck as badly as I did but didn't know how. I slid myself down further on the couch so that my crotch was against his neck and his head was over my small pale waist. I wished just then that I'd had more wine, but I wanted it so badly at that point that I new I couldn't stop now. I pat my chest, “Up, Monty,” I said. He heaved his front paws onto the couch, straddling my body, and his massive dick was poised between my legs. I just had to shift myself a little to get it just right. He was still panting and trying to thrust, and his cock kept hitting my thigh and then my ass. He must have known he was close because he started to speed up, so that when he finally found his mark, he rammed deep, deep into my pussy faster and harder than anyone ever had before. Just as I cried out in mingled pain and pleasure,.
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